Till we meet again, farewell for now

I was back in KL last Friday to see CF for the last time before he leaves. I would have preferred to meet him closer to his departure date, but that would be difficult as his family would want to spend time with him as well.

We watched Pirates of the Caribbean at One Utama. Two thumbs up for the movie.

Although I kinda forgot some of the things which happened in the first one, it was still an enjoyable pirates adventure with Captain Jack Sparrow.

Even though the second part of a trilogy is usually more like a filler and somewhat a teaser to the finale, Pirates managed to hold its own and it is all thanks to Johnny Depp.

I think it would be the biggest blockbuster movie for the year. Can’t wait for the finale next year, which will have Chow Yuen Fatt as a ruthless pirate and apparently Singapore would be featured more prominently than just the two mentions of the word Singapore in this one. LOL

They were so proud of it that it this little titbit was published in the newspapers.

Knowing CF would not understand the underlying sentiment, I still said anyway - let’s catch the Pirates 3 next year, when I go visit you in Vancouver.

After the movie, we shopped around for a while, as we wait for the rest of his high school friends to come. The farewell for CF was to be at Shogun, the Japanese buffet restaurant.

There were six of his friends, all guys and four of them knew about us. We all had quite a lot of fun eating, chatting, laughing, etc. I usually get along well with people younger than myself, so it wasn’t that difficult to join in the conversations.

Besides, I have met a few of them before.

Now, as far as I know, the rest are all straight. So what is it with straight people who try to act all gay and lovey-dovey and huggy amongst themselves? Though it was quite funny to watch, it was ironic for me as I can’t do that because as much as I want to, CF is extremely self-conscious in public and he doesn’t allow me to.

I am quite affectionate, even in public. CF used to let me hold him in public, but he doesn’t any more, for reasons best known to himself. Or not.

Later I found out that his friends have quite a good impression of me, which I was glad.

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The next day, I was supposed to meet him for a very short while, as he had to attend a friend’s birthday celebration. We met at two in the afternoon and he left at half past three.

I had wanted to meet a friend of mine, RH, which I haven’t seen in a long time. She was quite excited that CF was coming along.

But then as it turned out, traffic was terrible and it was difficult to look for a parking space for all three of us, so RH only got to get acquainted with CF for thirty minutes.

RH started to tell me about the updates in her life. She is close to a former classmate of mine, who said that he would not send his sons to all-boys school as he didn’t want them to be gay.

I was like, WTF?

RH said she then asked him whether he knew anyone who was gay or perhaps, he had some gay tendencies while in high school.

Of course he said no (he’s straight, by the way), but then he specifically stated that I gave out good luck cards or something like that to everyone in my class.

First of all, I don’t remember to such a thing. Or maybe I did. But more importantly, what the hell is wrong with giving personalized messages to everyone?

This got CF laughing and trying to stifle his laughter. Not sure whether he choked on his salad or not though …..

Anyway, CF left not long after.

Before I could say anything, RH asked “Why do you go out about him?”

As I was about to answer, I realized her implied meaning. So I shot back, “You mean I could do better?”

“Yeah, he’s so mean to you. He treats you like shit. Not wanting you to visit him in Vancouver, taking you for granted, not letting go to church with him …. “

As it is, anyone who doesn’t know either of us and sees us in public, would know through observation that I love him very much and CF, to quote RH, “treats me like shit”.

The thing is, RH is a good character reader, being a woman and mature and all.

In this case though, I have known CF for the whole of seven months and I believe, or at least would like to believe that I understand CF better than she does.

True, CF is mean. He is mean to the people who love and care for him. In fact, he treats his friend better than he does towards me.

His rationale? Friends don’t understand if he were to treat them not so nicely, whereas his loved ones are supposed to understand him and his actions better, even his flaws, thus allowing him to be himself.

Twisted logic it may be, but that’s CF for you and me.

About him not wanting me to go to church with him, his logic is that his friends which are much younger than me (they are eighteen) don’t feel comfortable with me around. I am not as “crazy” as they are and there would be some awkwardness if I were present.

Yeah, this is somewhat related to the other point, about taking care of his friends’ feelings more than mine.

I told her all these. I know deep down he loves me ... but it's far too deep to surface LOL

CF is, at the moment, incapable of fully expressing his affection towards me. Not that he ever did.

And his reason is because of a fight that we had in early June. He still hasn’t gotten over it.

Granted it was almost entirely my fault … but then CF is a sensitive and emotional soul and he needs his time to heal.

In fact, this whole post seems to be pointing out all the bad things about CF.

But really, he's a sweet dear.

Which brings me to my main point (finally)!

I realized I am not perfect either. He is still young and inexperienced. His environment has not made him a wiser person as yet.

Though sometimes, he can be wise in his own ways.

This is my first serious relationship. I know it is hard work to maintain but I am willing to stick by it till it is not possible anymore.

I gave him a book of pictures of us and our memories together thus far. Let's look forward to creating more memories together ...