Sunday, February 22, 2009

To be ourselves

I suppose it is easier to live a life when you know what is expected of you. It is much harder to create your own choices and expectations. Takes effort to redefine ones roles and responsibilities.

I do realise that it is not easy to do so either. Many years of social conditioning can do that to people. Things like guys making the first move to ask girls out, girls not encouraged to show affection first; these things confound me.

Of course, if one is happy to live within these rules and boundaries, then it's alright. But when one is not, isn't it time to change?

We have only one life and I believe we should live it the best we could. We should be the captain of our own ship and not let the wind and seas dictate where we go.

Being true to oneself could be difficult especially when we feel obliged to please the people around us or to fulfill their expectations. I have realised that it is pointless to do so. Why live up to other people's standards? Why make others happy when you yourself is not?

It might sound selfish, but isn't there a saying about being liked and accepted for who you are, rather than someone you are not, is much better? Because in the end, the choices that we make or don't make that affect ourselves the most. People around us might prefer that we make another choice, but it is not them that live our lives. We do.

Be true to yourself, and be proud of it.


Takashi said...

i am gay and I am proud of it!

Kenji said...

Hahaha I feel bad... cause I'm valid to all the things that you said... stereotype, etc...! xD

But yes, whatever suits our lifestyle I suppose? You know that well! :P

Jaded_Jeremy said...

With privilege, comes responsibilities. Ponder beyond this.

Twilight Zone said...

What you said is so true! just to please others will get us bullied under their thumbs! I often freaked out under pressure coz I am confident and proud of myself.

Reader said...

hmmm, sounds like u have some decisions to make soon that will not please everyone ... :-)

but yes, by all means, be yourself; be true, be genuine, and not be false, or a mere attempt to imitate some model, and certainly not be a hypocrite.

however, sometimes - or perhaps all the time - the road to discovering and being our true, genuine, pure selves, needs to be hard, unhappy, lonely and even scary ... but thats when the desire to be true will push you on and along the seemingly daunting road. but you will understand when you see the end.

Derek said...

takashi: Yeah, we all know that. And we love you for it! ;-)

Kenji: Yes dear, still waiting for you to break down the closet! Heh.

But yeah, whatever suits your lifestyle.

Jaded Jeremy: So deep ah!

Twilight Zone: Yup, I totally understand. It is hard, but always stand up for you believe in and act on what you feel is the best! ;-)

Reader: Thanks for the advice. And I don't have any decisions to make! This is just a rambling post ;-)

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