Monday, December 25, 2006

Christmas on the beach

I spent Christmas eve at Sentosa, on the beach, listening to the waves, talking, laughing, drinking ....

Was afraid the rain would spoil the plans, but luckily it stopped just in time.

Arrived at the beach close to midnight, with nary a visitor in sight. Actually, there were, but it was too dark to see. Sentosa looks totally different in the dark.

Found a nice little hut cum shelter to put down our stuff and food - turkey and log cake and drinks.

A few invitees didn't turn up and coincidentally, I asked someone to come along. Should have ask more people as we have lots of unfinished food when we left this morning.

It's a different way to spend Christmas eve, away from the crowds, the lights of the city, the noise of the vehicles. I never like countdowns; people stand so close to each other that they can smell what the other had for dinner.

Which explains why I have never been to one at KLCC or Bukit Bintang or wherever.

Most of them, I have only met once. But it was fun, to see them again.

We joked, we laughed, we made fun and teased each other.


And I told him, finally.

It's never easy to break the bad news. But I suppose truth hurts, untruth hurts more.

I am more used to being down, rather than doing it.

Which probably explains my hesitance.

I planned to do it some time later, after I come back from KL, but someone said that now was as good a time as any.

I was wrong to have misled him, to have given mixed signals or worse still, hope.

I am really sorry for that.

Admittedly, the attention was flattering. It was nice to be cared for. It was touching to have someone buy dinner when I was working late.

I actually did try. For the past two weeks, I did. By going out, watching movies, dinner, the book I got him .....

But these things can't be forced, can they? Deep down, I knew what to do, but it was the doing part that was difficult.

Thanks to someone, I was given a little push to just say it.

To just do it. To just let it out.

And I did.

I felt better after that. He did too.

He's a nice person. I can even say that he is caring to a fault sometimes. He deserves someone better who can appreciate him for who is.

More importantly, we are still friends.


muwo said...

Things to be happy about:"Let's be friend!" ~;~

Prince of Darkness said...

At least frens do last... :) I'm glad...

Will said...

It's hard to do, but better to do it sooner than later. Glad you handled it well, glad he took it so well.

Ban said...

It's good you two can remain friends. :)

(er... i thought ou two were going steady. >.< )

Anonymous said...

WTF? What do you mean "He deserve someone better"?????

Are you trying to say that you are not good enough? Come on dude. I may not know you that well, but who the F**K are you to say that you are not good enough?

In my honest opinion, i think that you are good enough for anybody.....not everybody least those who deserve it unlike those jerks and assholes.

If you say that he deserve someone better, ask yourself if you are really saying that HE deserve someone better or do YOU deserve someone better, coz if you keep saying that you are not good enough, I think you need to re-evaluate your life cause i strongly believe that you are an individual who everyone wants to have in their lifes. ~ Phiak Phiak

savante said...

Glad that you guys have decided to remain friends. Sometimes, two guys just don't click well enough after all :)

rad said...

Well, at least he took it well enough that you two can still remain friends. That's good.

William said...

So this was the truth you were talking about. I thought you told him he has "offensive navel odour" or something. Hehe. At least you gave it a try.

Anonymous said...

Love can't be explained or logically analysed who is meant for who. People relies on each other's opinons, instincts and feel. I hope you did relie on the right ones, which leads to a happier life... Best of luck...

James aka P.J.P.

Anonymous said...


- Vincent

Yen said...

Am glad you two are friends still. Merry Christmas!

Jon said...

Hey, I was in Sentosa on Xmas Eve too. I left Sentosa at 9pm, after the Musical Fountain show. Maybe our paths crossed??

Anyway, sorry to hear about the confrontation. Some things are not easy to face, but at least you acted wise. Best wishes.

Derek said...

muwo: True. At least we're still buddies.

p.o.d: I am glad too. ;P

will: Sometimes the right thing is the hardest thing to do eh? ;P

ban: You thought wrong, bunny dear ;P

phiak2: I said "He deserves someone better who can appreciate him for who is"

By just taking the first part, you have taken it out of context.

I never said I was never good enough. Thanks for your comments and thoughts ;P

savante: Yup, that thing call chemistry.

rad: Yupz ...

william: Hmmm, not funny lor ;P

james: James dear, I think this way is better. Thanks for the support!

vincent: *hugs back*

yen: Merry Xmas to you too! And a Happy New Year!

jon: Really? We miss each other like, 2 hours! LOL

We can arrange for a proper meet-up, instead of waiting for chances. LOL