Monday, December 26, 2005

Stay back from my backside

Overheard during my colleagues’ visit to my house on Friday.

PL: I used to have piles before. Damn painful when I need to go toilet. You see, when I am studying, I don’t like to go and do other things. Even when nature calls, I will still sit there at the table.
JS: No wonder la you have piles.
PL: Yeah. So I went to see the doctor. You know what he did? He put one finger in my asshole. Quite deep some more. I was like Wahhhh ….

At this point, I was smirking.

JS: How did you feel?
Me (thinking): You had a hard on?
PL: Pain lar of course. Damn pain you know. You try putting a finger and see what it feels like.
JS: Oh no no no … no need … I don’t want anybody to go near there ….

I was like, what the fuck? That wasn’t the answer I expected. Probably it was painful because of the piles. If he was healthy and all, I am certain the answer would be quite different.

Anyway, straight people and their extreme phobia (paranoia?) of other people doing things to their butts. With that kind of attitude, they clearly are missing out on something good and don't know it. They keep thinking that they can only feel good with that dangly organ in front and completely ignore the pleasure they can get from behind.

Which is the male G-spot, i.e. the prostate.

I do realize that even if they do know, they are not gonna openly admit it.

Silly straight boys. And their equally silly ideas of masculinity.


savante said...

Hardly any straight boy is going to admit to enjoying it - and I have to say that it might not have been enjoyable since a rough guy perfunctorily twisting his finger in your anus isn't exactly the foreplay that we all want.

The piles wouldn't have made it easier :)


Legolas said...

Don't know yet whether it'll be good or not. At least I'm willing to try. Hahaha...

MrBunnyBan said...

Oooo, picking on the poor widdle straight guys' precious masculinity again? You big meany! :D

asmadi said...

i think you need to enlighten them as to the benefits of taking it up the arse, hehehe.

you get well soon ok.

Shigeki said...

Your post reminded me of the introduction to this. I was introduced to it by a straight friend of mine who really enjoyed this. But he is not a homo. how sad. On a rare occasion, some straight people are not afraid of what pleases them. :-)

Derek said...

savante: I agree. Only doctors like ahem ... yourself would be sweet and gentle when inserting the finger. ;P

legolas: Honey, did you just volunteer yourself? I am sure there are a lot of takers. ;P

mrbunnyban: Who else but them?

asmadi: I think I really need to.

Thanks for the wishes, asmadi.

shigeki: I suppose, generally, Asian straight men are less adventurous and still conservative than their Western counterpart.

Or maybe they just won't admit their kinkier side.

But your straight friend is way cool! LOL

Musang said...

what do we have to tell the doctor to have a check-up like that?

would love to get one from any macho doctor and steal their heart with a grip of the anal muscles on their fingers...

hehehehe/*evil laugh*

Derek said...

bitch: Try asking Paul. He might know.

Oh, and your evil plan is just plain evil ... So good luck to you!

Chris said...

Ugh... don't remind me of finger in the anal hole... ~.~